


Maybe I'm Starting to Believe

by Fangodess



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-23
Updated: 2017-05-23
Packaged: 2018-11-03 22:03:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10976226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangodess/pseuds/Fangodess





	Maybe I'm Starting to Believe

Connor had been withdrawn from Evan for weeks and it was beginning to worry him. Had he done something wrong? He probably had, he seemed to push people away. Even Jared was only hanging around him so his parents would pay for his car insurance.  
Evan had tried telling himself he just needed to calm down. He had tried figuring out on his own. He couldn’t figure out what he’d done so one day when they were studying in Connor’s room he blurted out, “If you’re going to break up with me can you just tell me now.”  
“What?” Connor exclaimed looking up abruptly.  
“Sorry it’s just you’re being withdraw, which is fine I understand I tend to drive people away so it makes sense that you want to leave me. It’s just I want to know before I get emotionally invested. I’m sorry. Well it’s not like I’m not already emotionally invested but I’d like to know before I do something stupid like tell you I love you or something like that. Although I guess I just did that, sorry, but since you’re leaving me can we pretend that didn’t happen. I just want to know, sorry. I’m sorry,” Evan stuttered desperately barely able to breath but already planning how to get out.  
“I wasn’t going to break up with you,” Connor said calmly reaching out to try to calm evan. In any other situation, he would have laughed because only Evan would apologies because he was being broken up with.  
“Oh…sorry…I…sorry,” Evan gasped out in between stuttered broken breathes.  
“Hey, it’s okay,” Connor said as Evan’s breathing began to pick up and he began to hyperventilate, “Can you try to breathe with me?” Connor asked gently taking Evan’s shaking hands in his and placing them on his chest as he tried to regulate his breathing so Evan had a steady example.  
“That’s it you’re doing great. There you go. In and out, slow and steady,” Connor said in as calming a voice as he could, “You’re doing so good sweetheart, just try to breath with me,” eventually Evan’s breathing calmed to broken stuttering breathes.  
“I’m sorry,” he says again, pulling his hands back and looking down.  
“Hey,” Connor said softly placing his hand on Evan’s jaw and bringing his face up to eye level, “It’s okay you didn’t do anything. I’m sorry I’ve been withdrawn. I didn’t think you would think I was going to break up with you. I’m sorry. I love you too.”  
Evan had tears running down his face, “I’m sorry,” Evan said again not knowing what to say, that being his default.  
“For what?” Connor asks.  
“I don’t know being as screwed up as I am? For making you have to deal with me? For constantly overreacting? I don’t know,” Evan listed, “I’m sorry,” he added.  
“It’s okay love, you didn’t do anything,” Connor said pulling him to his chest, “I love you,” he said kissing his forehead.  
“I love you too,” he said burying himself deeper into Connor’s chest, “I love you,” he said curling into Connor who was solid and warm and safe. Connor who would said he would be there for Evan, no matter what and maybe Evan was even beginning to believe it.


End file.
